“I have to give myself permission everyday. I have to do it daily. The way it presents itself is that when I'm giving myself permission, I'm choosing to ignore the way that I was brought up and the values that I was given in the way I should behave” - Henry Johnstone

The Permission Podcast Series : Exploring what it means to give yourself permission to live life on your own terms.

Henry to me, is someone I met about seven months ago and in that time, I've loved watching his journey as a coach, but also as a 'creative'- he is an epic metalwork artist!

What I love most is his willingness to be vulnerable, particularly as a man, and to talk about the deep stuff- the stuff that doesn't necessarily get talked about enough.

I absolutely loved this conversation, and I think my greatest aha moment actually came within the first few minutes - at times when self permission is a struggle, ask someone else to give you it! How crazy beautiful is that?

We also talk about 'play' and why we struggle with it, failing magnificently, recognising when you need to stick in your comfort zone and replacing 'should' with 'could'...

I hope you enjoy and I'd love to hear what comes up for you as you listen.

Find more about Henry here: www.henryjohnstone.org

Listen below or via your favourite podcast platform…

Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Stitcher

Music Credit

Ep. 6 Henry Johnstone: Giving myself permission as a daily practice

Show Notes:
A summary of conversation highlights that stood out for me…

4:06
I have to give myself permission everyday. I have to do it daily. The way it presents itself is that when I'm giving myself permission, I'm choosing to ignore the way that I was brought up and the values that I was given in the way I should behave in all situations.

7:10
It's a really self loving action, creativity, because I'm giving myself permission to play. But within that there's an anxiety that if I give myself permission to play, then I'm going to stop this 'busyness'. It's like this internal conflict. So if I get caught in that kind of tumbleweed, I simply go to someone else and I say, is it ok if I do this?

13:50
When we're growing up play is conditional, and really there's no need for it to be that way to whatsoever.

17:10
Being confronted with something that requires no rules and no timeframe... how do I start this? There's a confidence required in that and it's confidence based on one's own belief that whatever step they take forward from now will be the right step. And if it's not, it's okay that they get it wrong.

18:45
Whenever I start something, I tell myself I'm just gonna fail magnificently, which means that I'll throw everything up on the wall, some things will stick, some things won't. But who cares. I have to restructure my brain that failure isn't something to be avoided.

21:50
I knew that whenever I felt that feeling of 'I don't want to do this', that was the moment where if I did, I would experience the most relief and feel good feelings and therefore, I'm just simply going to do it.

25:00
If you don't feel like pushing yourself past your comfort zone that's absolutely fine. Please have a duvet day because we need to have that comfort and that security.

26:20
'Should' is so loaded with expectation. "I should be this way", that's immediately sign that absolutely no, you don't need to.

29:50
I knew I wanted to find a job that had meaning and purpose and I wanted to help people. I love being useful.

34:50
There's moments where I'm like, okay, I feel unhappy. What do I need to do to give myself the love that I'm craving right now?

35:50
I think it's quite hard to develop self awareness on one's own, I do believe that it helps a lot to do work with a coach or a therapist so that you can start to get that inner knowledge. In the same way that you experience me from the outside and I only experience myself from the inside out, we need someone else to tell us what's going on that we're missing.

37:30
The gold comes when you've got someone in the space asking you how does that feel? What are you feeling? Where'd that come from? You can't get that from reading a book. When you're with a coach or a therapist is not instructional, it's reflective.

40:10
Replace 'should' with 'could' and you have a choice.

Find out more and connect with Henry here:

“I help you when you feel hardened, and defeated by life. Together we delve deep into what's stopping you from being where you want to be. Heal your past and move forward with a passion! Get excited for what lies ahead, invigorate your sense of self and most importantly: feel happier. Your time is now.”

Find more about Henry here: www.henryjohnstone.org
FB: www.facebook.com/fearlesslyaman
IG: www.instagram.com/_henryjohnstone_
Podcast: ‘The Inner Warrior’ https://innerwarrior.podbean.com/